Motorcyclist Who Identifies As Bicyclist Sets Cycling World Record (satire)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipvesqJP1e4
Scientists Who Didn’t Predict A Single Thing Accurately For Last Two Months Confident They Know What The Weather Is Going To Be Like In 100 Years [satire]
Scientists Who Didn’t Predict A Single Thing Accurately For Last Two Months Confident They Know What The Weather Is Going To Be Like In 100 Years
April 29, 2020
WORLD – Authorities in the scientific community who touted faulty COVID-19 models are “pretty confident” they know what the weather is going to be like in 100 years, sources confirmed Wednesday.
“Yes, we were off by a factor of about 1 billion in our predictions for what happened over the last few months, but trust us: we know exactly what the climate is going to be like in a century,” said leading scientific authority Dr. Garth Wendybrook at a press conference. “See, I have this lab coat and this Bunsen burner here.” At this point, he gestured toward a Bunsen burner sitting on the table in front of him, but he accidentally caught his sleeve on fire. “Fire hot! Fire hot!” the scientist cried before diving in a nearby vat of acid to put it out.
Post-press-conference analysis indicated his observations were correct, and the fire was hot.
The scientists say they have settled on a climate model that confirms the earth’s average temperature will be either 1 million degrees Celsius or below freezing, give or take 1 million degrees.
The Beatles sing about Star Wars
The Beatles perform their critically acclaimed album Princess Leia’s Stolen Death Star Plans.
The first two videos:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYD3QtyEGGM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhFyX1IkjAM
Complete playlist:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL8s6sSjUyaxUk3mCUqiNuJiMNxs9QdthO
After years of hard work and studying, Trayvon Martin has earned a well deserved bachelor’s degree in aeronautical science from Florida Memorial University
According to this article from the New York Times, Trayvon Martin was just awarded a bachelor’s degree in aeronautical science from Florida Memorial University.
Martin worked very hard to earn this degree.
For example, after a school security camera showed Martin marking graffiti, a search of his backpack showed that it contained 12 pieces of women’s jewelry, including silver wedding rings, and earrings with diamonds. The backpack also had a screwdriver, which is often used as a tool by burglars. Martin said that the jewelry belonged to a friend, but refused to say who that friend was. It’s nice that Martin has such an interest in geology and metallurgy. It’s also a good sign of Martin’s moral character that he protected his friend.
In addition, testing showed that there was THC, the active ingredient in marijuana, in Martin’s system. This is exactly the kind of thing that pilots need in order to safely transport their passengers.
Furthermore, Martin broke George Zimmerman’s nose, and smashed Zimmerman’s head against the concrete. There are very few pilots who have ever managed to achieve this much bodily harm to Zimmerman.
Based on all of these accomplishments, I’m certain that Martin will make an excellent pilot. I can’t wait to have him as my pilot the next time I go on vacation.
I’m sure that Martin’s degree will greatly enhance the reputation of Florida Memorial University, as well as increase the prestige and earning potential of its graduates.
When it comes to STEM subjects, MIT, Caltech, and Carnegie Mellon are usually considered to be the best universities. And for sure, the people who go to these great halls of learning do possess a superior level of intellect and intelligence. But I think Martin’s hard work and achievements have shown that Florida Memorial University outperforms and eclipses them all when it comes to attracting, teaching, and graduating the very best and brightest mathematical and scientific geniuses.
I have no doubt that Martin will go on to win a Nobel Prize in Physics, as well as a Fields Medal.
Copernicus, Galileo, Kepler, Newton, Einstein, and Hawking are all well regarded for their scientific genius, and I’m certain that in 500 years from now, Martin’s name will be just as well known for his contributions to the world of scientific knowledge and discovery.
Dan from Squirrel Hill's Blog 