Kim Jong Un shows Europe why North Korea is superior at cutting edge technology

The Washington Post just published this article and photograph. I realize that this sounds like satire from the Onion, but it really is a real news article:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/12/31/this-photo-of-kim-jong-un-riding-a-ski-lift-is-north-koreas-way-of-flipping-off-europe/

This photo of Kim Jong Un riding a ski lift is North Korea’s way of flipping off Europe

December 31, 2013


North Korean leader Kim Jong-un inspects the Masik Pass ski resort


North Korean leader Kim Jong Un takes a solemn ski lift ride during his inspection tour at the Masik Pass ski resort, near Wonsan, North Korea.

I’ll explain. Kim is thought to have developed a love for skiing when he went to boarding school (under a fake identity) in Switzerland. One of his pet projects since taking power two years ago has been building a giant ski resort, something that does not immediately serve the world’s poorest country but would be meant as a show of national greatness. So Kim made it a top national priority to build the resort, Masik Pass, and work has been proceeding feverishly.

But Kim’s pet project hit a major snag this August: ski lifts. Kim just could not get his hands on any ski lifts. North Korea doesn’t have the technology to build its own. And the countries that make them all tend to be in the West, where new sanctions imposed in March make it illegal to sell luxury goods to the Hermit Kingdom. North Korea tried offering millions of dollars to Austrian and French companies to import ski lifts, but both said no.

Finally, North Korea tried to import from a Swiss company, offering $7.7 million for the lifts. It would be a logical choice: The country’s well-known history of neutrality at times extends even to Pyongyang. But the Swiss government blocked the deal, calling the Masik Pass resort a “propaganda project.”

Pyongyang was so angry it issued a furious response via official state outlet KCNA, declaring, “This is an intolerable mockery of the social system and the people of the DPRK and a serious human rights abuse that politicizes sports and discriminates against the Koreans.” Yes, you read that correctly: North Korea called Switzerland’s refusal to sell it ski lifts a “serious human rights abuse.”

In the four months since Switzerland blocked the sale, North Korea appears to have somehow acquired ski lifts. It’s not clear how or from where; presumably they’re confident in the lift’s safety for Kim himself to take this lonely ride up the slope. The photo is surely meant primarily to demonstrate to North Koreans that the ski resort is coming along and that the ski lifts have the leader’s confidence. But it’s hard not to also see this as Kim thumbing his nose at Europe, as if to say that he doesn’t need their stinking ski lifts anyway.

North Korean state media called the ski lift a “great monumental structure.” Kim reportedly said that the resort was “at the center of the world’s attention” (it’s a central myth of North Korean propaganda that the entire globe is rapt with admiration and wonderment at North Korea’s every ribbon-cutting) and said it would open as soon as possible.

Advertisements

January 3, 2014. Tags: , , , , , , . Communism, Economics, Humor, Politics.

2 Comments

  1. HMichaelH replied:

    I think the real advanced technology this vicious little moron is demonstrating is “Invisible Skis!!!!” This is a slight adaptation of the story of the Emperor who has no clothes. If he actually just forgot to put skis on, how is he going to get down the mountain? I guess we can’t blame him for his forgetfulness, since it’s all-consuming to be busy killing off your perceived enemies and family members.

  2. AWC replied:

    This is great news! In just a few more years we can expect North Korea to advance even further with the implementation of the wheel, followed closely by sliced bread. Great job Kim! Welcome to 1945.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Trackback URI

%d bloggers like this: